Ouroboros: A Blog?

Who am I-Andy Rooney? Reading back over my first post, I thought, “What crotchety old bastard wrote that?” I sound like someone who refused to buy a VCR in the ‘80s because he didn’t want to learn how to work the thing. Oh well. As a wise man once said, “20/20 is good eyesight.”

This brings me to my second minor diatribe on blogs. Like most anything I’ve ever written, having time to gain distance and depth offers the opportunity to critique my own, and very rarely am I not in some way embarrassed about what I wrote. Actually being proud is even rarer. This applies to term papers, short stories, resumes, grocery lists-you name it. And now blog entries. About the only time I look back at something I wrote and think, “Not too shabby,” is when I read some little scribble or sketch that I wrote that 99% of the people in the world would read and say, “I don’t get it.” One such story is the tale of Tuck, which I will post now to demonstrate my point:

Tuck the Wiley Belt Buckle

Tuck was a sad but wily belt buckle and he had many problems that he could not face. He would hide himself on a shelf and never look in the mirror. He used to have friends that would play with him and love him all day long. But that was then and this is not then. Tuck got so mad one day that he decided not to buckle at all.

Gary, his owner, asked him, “Tuck, why will you not buckle today?”

And to this Tuck replied, “Gary, I used to love to buckle all day, everyday for you, but now I feel that you do not need me to buckle.”

“Oh, hogwash, Tuck. You know I need you to buckle so that my pants will not fall down.”

Tuck looked deep into Gary’s eyes and saw that what he said was more than words; he spoke passion with a capital “P” for his favorite belt buckle.

Tuck then cried out, “Oh, Gary. I can’t believe that I would not buckle for you,” and immediately buckled.

Gary looked down with a grin, patted his belt and said, “That’s the Tuck I know and love. Now let’s go make this a world worth fighting for. Okay?”

“Okay,” answered Tuck. And the two strolled off into the distance.

THE END

I have several of these that I plan on posting on from time to time, so I caution any potential reader: be prepared to possibly develop a migraine, become angry or confused, and/or any combination of the aforementioned.

I realize that my first two posts have mainly been critiques of blogs themselves, so I’m considering renaming my blog something along the lines of “Blog: The Blog Blog,” or maybe “Ouroboros-A Blog.” I’ll keep you posted. (Get it? POSTED? Blog humor! OWW!) How long before I cringe when I read this post? Probably not long.